Grand Rapids

Grand Rapids Polaroids 2008–2018 traces my earliest years of photographing queer desire in West Michigan, before I broke my neck in 2009. At the time, I was already obsessed with intimacy and the body, even if I did not yet fully understand what I was building as an artist.

I bought instant film from the Walgreens down the street, often writing checks I hoped would clear before payday. These pictures are raw, urgent, and experimental — early attempts to photograph queer intimacy without yet knowing Polaroid’s history as a lifeline for gay men. Instant film felt private, physical, and permanent, qualities that drew me instinctively toward it.

Looking back, these images mark the beginning of my voice as a photographer: messy, unpolished, and completely my own. They capture a formative period shaped by desire, friendship, risk, and the search for self in a place that was both home and constraint.

Person with light brown hair wearing a knit beanie and sleeveless shirt sitting by a car window with a blurred landscape of trees outside.
A shirtless young man with short hair sitting at a kitchen table, drinking from a glass, with wooden cabinets and a refrigerator in the background.
Photo of a person sitting on a wooden deck, wearing light-colored shorts and a white shirt, with legs crossed at the ankles and feet visible.
Two shirtless young men sitting outside near a house, one holding a gun and both smiling. One has a beanie hat and the other has short hair. The house has beige siding, windows with curtains, and a sliding door behind them.
A young man with short brown hair, wearing a beanie, sleeveless shirt, and shorts, standing next to a large white stone lion statue outside a building with red columns and windows.
A faded Polaroid photo of three smiling young adults, two women and one man, outdoors during daytime.
A woman with long brown hair and large earrings making a playful, grimacing face while sitting in a car.
A blurry photo of a person sitting at a restaurant table with a hamburger, a glass of water, and a milkshake in front of them. The background includes patterned curtains and a decorative red wall panel.
A shirtless young man holding a rifle outdoors on a sunny day with trees and houses in the background.
Child playing on a grassy field, bending backward with arms near head, in a suburban neighborhood during daytime.
Two young men sitting shirtless on a wooden deck, making heart shapes with their hands, with a house and trees reflected in the window behind them.
Octagonal carved wooden plaque with a nature scene of animals and plants.
A shirtless young man with a mohawk hairstyle aiming a rifle outdoors, with smoke or mist around him and a clear sky in the background.
A young man and woman outdoors, with the man leaning towards the camera and smiling, and the woman wearing sunglasses and smiling, with barren trees in the background.
A person with curly hair and glasses taking a blurry selfie in a mirror, with visible scratches on the mirror's surface.
A young man with brown hair, wearing a gray beanie, a striped scarf, and a green shirt, taking a selfie indoors in front of a window.
A blurry Polaroid photograph of a person with shaggy, curly hair wearing glasses and a striped hoodie, standing indoors against a beige wall.
A young man with short, tousled light brown hair taking a selfie indoors. He is wearing a gray V-neck shirt, sitting in a wooden chair with a patterned cushion. There are paintings and a plant in the background.
A window with curtains, her silhouette and a cat sitting on a nearby surface, backlit by natural light.
A blurry, vintage-style portrait of a young person with medium-length dark hair, wearing a green jacket, taking a reflective photo through a mirror or glass surface.
Blurred photo of a person with short hair, wearing a scarf and dark shirt, standing in a room with a light-colored wall and a door in the background.
A blurry vintage Polaroid photograph of a rainy suburban street scene with houses, a tree, a fire hydrant, and a black car parked on the wet road.
A silhouette of a person sitting at a dining table, writing or drawing on a notepad, with a window behind them allowing bright light into the room.
A young man taking a selfie, with messy hair, wearing a white t-shirt with partially visible text, standing near a doorframe with sunlight coming through.
A young man with brown hair wearing a gray knit beanie, a green t-shirt, and a colorful plaid scarf, taking a selfie outdoors in front of a building with a window and trees visible in the background.
A blurry Polaroid photo of a woman with shoulder-length hair, wearing a dark hoodie, leaning her head against a wall, with her eyes closed.
A blurry Polaroid photo of a person with dark, spiky hair, wearing a light-colored shirt, taking a selfie indoors with a room background and a dark curtain on the right side.
Two people sharing cookies indoors, one wearing a black jacket and hoodie, the other in a dark dress, standing under a chandelier.
A blurry Polaroid photo of a young man sitting in a room, holding a lit cigarette to his mouth, with a cluttered desk and shelf with books and papers in the background.
A woman with brown hair smiling and leaning into the camera, inside a vehicle.
A young man with curly hair smiling and showing missing front teeth, wearing a white jacket.
A person with short dark hair sitting on a floral ottoman in a dimly lit room, wearing a black jacket and shorts, with a blurred background including books and photo frames.
Two young men on a boat by a lake, one holding a vitamin water bottle, both smiling and making playful expressions.
Person taking a photo with a camera outside near a body of water, wearing a gray hoodie and glasses.
Two young adults standing outdoors near a body of water, wearing casual vintage clothing with accessories like sunglasses, scarves, and badges, during daytime with cloudy sky.
A young man with brown hair wearing a gray beanie, glasses hanging on his shirt, plaid shirt, and a white t-shirt, standing outdoors near a body of water with tall grasses behind him, shielding his eyes with one hand from the sunlight.
Two people sitting on a wooden dock near a body of water, laughing and enjoying themselves. One person holds a yellow bottle.
Young man with dark curly hair standing against a brick wall, wearing a plaid shirt, white t-shirt, and sunglasses hanging from his collar.
A person with short hair wearing glasses and a maroon sweatshirt pressed against a brick wall with textured glass window, looking through it closely.
A young man with glasses wearing a plaid scarf outdoors near a body of water with trees and a bench in the background.
A young woman with red hair and a young man with glasses sitting outdoors in tall grass, both looking to the right with serious expressions.
Two young men sitting outdoors, wearing casual clothing and glasses, with a cloudy sky in the background.
A young person with short hair looking to the right, wearing a striped sleeveless shirt and a necklace, standing against a dark background.
A young man with short red hair wearing a light gray polo shirt, sitting with a bottle in hand, looking to his left, near a white vehicle with emergency equipment in the background and a handwritten caption at the bottom of the photo that reads "Hell
Young man with short brown hair and blue eyes holding a small dog with long ears, wearing a plaid scarf and a white sleeveless shirt, standing against a wooden fence.
A person with short, wavy hair, glasses, and a nose ring, holding a cigarette, wearing a patterned scarf and sleeveless top, against a dark background.
A young man with short brown hair, wearing a white tank top and a multicolored scarf around his neck, is holding a lit cigarette close to his face, looking directly at the camera against a dark background.
Group of three young women taking a selfie, with two visible in the foreground, one with short brown hair, wearing a headband and a colorful scarf, and the other with glasses and dark hair, all looking at the camera.
Young person with short dark hair, wearing a white tank top, a multicolored scarf, and a white headband, standing against a wooden wall.
A young person with brown hair and blue eyes wearing a gray hat, a navy scarf, a gray sweater, and a plaid shirt standing in front of a wooden wall.
A woman and a man taking a portrait photograph together, both looking directly at the camera with neutral expressions. The woman has short dark hair with a headband, and the man has short hair and is wearing a sleeveless top.
A young person with short brown hair wearing a gray cap, a gray t-shirt, a dark scarf, and jeans, standing outside a house and holding an open door handle.
Young woman with dark, curly hair and glasses hanging from her collar, standing in front of a wall decorated with photographs, wearing a polka dot shirt and a necklace with a pendant.
Person posing on a small porch with vinyl siding, wearing a white cropped top, denim skirt, and brown boots, leaning against the wall with arms outstretched.
Young man lying across a large white pole on a balcony, wearing a striped tank top, jeans, and black shoes, with gray siding on the exterior wall behind him.
A young man with short hair wearing a striped tank top, holding a tape measure on his shoulder, standing in front of a gray horizontal panel wall.
Two women standing on a balcony, one looking up and the other looking down, with a sliding glass door behind them and a roof above.
A young woman in a white tank top, scarf, black pants, and tan boots leaning on a porch column inside a house, looking at the camera.
Young man wearing a white cap and green jacket holding a beer bottle, making a hand gesture, standing against a plain background.
A person with short, messy dark hair, wearing glasses, a patterned scarf, and black bracelets, posing with one arm behind their head, against a dark wooden wall.
Three young people standing indoors, one holding a smoothie and another with a coffee mug, engaged in conversation.
Teenager in a white polo shirt and white baseball cap holding a container of ice cream while making a peace sign with his left hand, standing against a plain beige wall.
Young man with brown hair, wearing a beanie hat, a plaid scarf, a tank top, and holding colorful sneakers, standing against a plain wall.
Two young men sitting in a bathtub; one is wearing a yellow shirt with a green jacket and a necklace, looking up; the other is wearing a sleeveless shirt with a graphic print, a scarf, a beanie, and sunglasses, resting his head on his hand.
Person with short, dark hair, wearing glasses, a black and white striped shirt with a crest, a pearl necklace, and bracelets, striking a pose against a neutral background.
Three young people standing in a bathroom, one holding a red cup, with a door, towel, and hanging hooks visible in the background.
Young man with brown hair doing a side stretch pose, holding his left ankle with his left hand and extending his right arm to the side, standing against a plain wall. He is wearing a sleeveless shirt with 'Green Bay Swimming and Diving' printed on it
A young woman in a yellow hoodie and floral shorts sitting on a man's lap, both smiling at the camera in an indoor setting with a wooden door behind them.
A person taking a mirror selfie in a dimly lit room with a flash reflection obscuring their face. They are wearing a sports jersey and a bandana around their neck.
Young man with dark hair, wearing a black knit beanie, a white tank top with a 'Green Bay Swimming and Diving' logo, a green and red plaid scarf, sunglasses hanging from his shirt, and a red wristband, holding a bottle of beer, standing indoors near
A young man with short brown hair, wearing a light green zip-up jacket, yellow shirt, and a beaded necklace, standing against a beige wall with a serious expression, holding a fist up near his chest.
Two young men kissing at night, one wearing a beanie and sleeveless shirt, the other in a hoodie, with a tree in the background.
Young woman with dark hair wearing a black and white striped shirt, blue jeans, a beaded necklace, and a mask on her head, posing against a plain beige wall.
Young man with short hair and a pierced ear, pressing his hand against his head while another person uses a hairbrush to style his hair.
Two young men in a close-up photo, one wearing sunglasses and the other with a hoodie and earbuds.
Young person with short curly hair, wearing a green jacket and purple shorts, crouching near a wall with an electrical outlet, looking to the left.
A woman with glasses and shoulder-length hair posing on the floor inside a room with a black background and brick wall. She is wearing a plaid jacket, a gray top, and jeans, with one leg bent and the other extended. She is barefoot on her right foot
Multiple hands holding small amber glass bottles in a circle.
A man wearing a baseball cap drinking from a straw with a blurred background.
A young man with glasses and a striped beanie kisses a large dog with gray and black fur.
A man dressed in a racing shirt and a race bib that reads 'LUV2DRNK' is drinking from a can.
Two young men sitting close together with a dog in front of them, smiling and wearing hats, in a room with cans in the background.
A shirtless young man wearing glasses, a beanie, gray jeans, and white sneakers posing on a rooftop with dark sky in the background.
Two individuals showing their chest tattoos, with one wearing a partially unbuttoned shirt and the other pulling their shirt down, revealing their tattoos.
Two young men at a bar or social gathering, one wearing a cap backwards and holding a drink, the other with a beanie and glasses, standing behind a table with blue cups, canned drinks, and a bottle of alcohol.
Group of four young men posing together at a party, some holding drinks and wearing casual clothing, with one person showing a middle finger gesture.
A group of four people posing indoors, three standing in front and one woman behind them with her arms raised. The date 'April 13th, 2017' is handwritten at the bottom of the photo.
Two young men in an indoor setting, one standing in an orange hoodie making a hand gesture, and the other sitting in a wheelchair wearing glasses, a beige jacket, and a patterned scarf, both smiling at the camera.
Woman sitting outdoors in a wooden chair, wearing sunglasses, smiling, holding a bottle of Coors Light beer, with trees in the background.
A woman wearing sunglasses sitting on a wooden chair outdoors, holding a beverage with a printed label, with trees and a canopy in the background.
A young woman with dark hair smiling, sitting on a chair with her hands clasped, indoors near a large window with curtains and a brick wall.
A young woman with shoulder-length black hair making a playful face with her tongue out, outdoors in front of a brick building and bushes.
Three people standing outdoors, one man and two women, with greenery and a house in the background.
Two men, one standing and one seated in a motorized wheelchair outdoors under a metal roof, with trees in the background. The man in the wheelchair is wearing a striped tank top and denim shorts. The other man is wearing a white t-shirt and pink shor
Blurry photo of a black dog with a collar, sitting on a porch with outdoor furniture, a barbecue grill, and trees in the background.
A black puppy with a collar sitting on a porch, with a bench, a trash can, and parked cars visible in the background.
Black puppy lying on brick patio, chewing on a stick.
People taking a photo of the Cloud Gate sculpture in Millennium Park, Chicago, reflected on its shiny, curved surface.
People gathered around the Cloud Gate sculpture in Millennium Park, Chicago, with buildings and trees in the background and the polished reflective surface of the sculpture showing distorted reflections of the scene.
Two young men, one standing and one seated in a motorized wheelchair, pose in front of a mirrored structure with other people walking and riding bikes in the background.
A group of people at a beach resort, some sitting on lounge chairs, others walking or standing, with a canopy and RVs in the background, and a man wearing sunglasses in the foreground.
Two men taking a close-up selfie at the beach, smiling with rocks and water in the background.
A man with long hair wearing a backward baseball cap, smiling, shirtless, sitting in a wheelchair, with tattoos on his chest and neck, indoors with wooden walls.
Blurred Polaroid photo of a dog with black and tan fur, possibly a German Shepherd, on a wooden floor, with a black object or furniture leg visible in the background.
Overexposed Polaroid photo of a person's face with glasses, showing a wooden door and a telephone on the wall in the background.
Two shirtless young men taking a close-up selfie together, one with a backward cap and the other with short hair and blue eyes.
Close-up of a person's face, focusing on their lips and nose, with a finger touching their lips.
Blurred Polaroid photo of two children lying back to back, facing opposite directions, with a wooden surface in the background.
A woman with platinum blonde hair and makeup, wearing a plaid shirt and a light-colored jacket in a blurred, pink-tinted background.
A woman with blonde hair, heavy makeup, and a plaid shirt, in a softly lit indoor setting, possibly a store or mall.
Polaroid photo of a woman with blonde hair, makeup, and a plaid shirt under a light sweater, looking to the side with an intense expression.
Two young men, one sitting in a wheelchair and the other standing beside him, smiling and hugging in a park with a large tree in the background. A black dog is walking on the grass nearby.
Two men and a dog outdoors in front of trees, one man in a wheelchair and one standing, with a chair and a bird feeder in the background.